Women tend to think of men as those who always want sex.
Therefore, when her beloved husband begins to shirk his wife’s satisfaction, she has an overwhelming bunch of suspicions and a lot of complexes.
How to find out the reason for the sudden disappearance of sexual desire and how to resume intimate life? Now let's figure it out.
He does not want me - what is the reason?
The first thing to do is to find the answer to such an urgent question "Why?" How do you want to have such instructions for each male representative, where it would be indicated in what situation what reasons for the mechanism breakdown should be sought and how to fix them. But men are not robots and instructional cards are not attached to them, and therefore, as always, they will have to understand everything themselves.
Reason number 1 - routine in bed
Well, who among us has not heard that intimate life can become monotonous? Perhaps everyone has heard about it, but not many people draw some kind of analogy with their own lives. It is not enough just to satisfy the physiological needs, it is necessary that the sexual life also implies your intimacy. If sex for a man has become just a routine duty, sooner or later he will start to avoid this process, justifying it with standard excuses like “tired”, “want to sleep” and so on.
Reason number 2 - the extinction of passionate fervor over time
At the beginning of the relationship, almost all couples have a violent intimate life. Partners can not fully enjoy each other and the question "Why a man does not want sex?" people do not even come to mind. But over time, the husband gets used to the measured rhythm of life, which in some cases adds some sadness and eliminates all sexual desire.
Reason number 3 - fatigue, nervousness
It turns out that the “I'm tired” excuse is not always an excuse, and sometimes a very weighty argument. Problems at work quite often affect the family life of people, including the sexual relations of spouses. The fact is that many men do not know how to leave these same problems at work and stubbornly drag them into the house, because of what they can not afford to relax and devote time to their beloved woman.
Reason number 4 - quarrels, scandals
Representatives of the beautiful half of humanity love to watch movies / read books, where the stormy scandal of spouses ends with no less stormy scenes in bed. But life draws several other perspectives and instead of crazy sex you get offended husband and a wall of silence for a week.
Reason number 5 - the difference in biorhythm and temperament
The spouses have a differently planned day, their lives in different biorhythms, and therefore when one craves sex in the evening, the other, coming from work, falls asleep and his sexual desire appears only in the morning.
Also, temperament plays a significant role. One has enough sex once a week, and someone is not satisfied with everyday sexual intercourse. Here again, the first years of your family life come to mind, and a hysterical statement arises: "But, after all, everything was fine in the past!" What plays a role here is that you have already got accustomed to each other, have enjoyed each other in moderation and are now starting to adapt to a promising and long family life, where everyone should be comfortable.
Reason number 6 - the long absence of sex
Psychologists recommend practicing abstaining from sex for a week, a maximum of two in order for sexual desire to increase and sexual acts to become more vivid. But some couples due to eternal fuss and employment prolong this period by a month, or even more, which is fraught with negative consequences. The spouses in this case may have no desire for sexual activity, because there is some comfort in this - in the morning, breakfast is on the go, all day cares, return home in the evening and immediately put your head on the pillow or stick in front of the TV-friend’s screen. Sex, as we see, is not included in this list.
We begin to build sex life
For a start, it would be nice to just talk to your spouse, and this should not be a conversation dash, please go to bed, but a frank conversation in order to understand what is your obstacle to sexual activity. However, it is not worth pinning too high hopes on such a conversation. It is unlikely that a man himself will be able to clearly define what prevents him from a broken rhythm of life or tells you that your biorhythms do not match. So, you need to do something based on their own considerations. When the reasons are clear, it's time to start eliminating them. So what can you do?
• We arrange a romantic evening
We leave the children with our grandmother, prepare a delicious dinner, light candles and all according to the standard scenario, the non-standard continuation is more important here. But this should be done on the weekends, when the husband is free and rested, and not when he returns home almost at midnight, and here you are in a seductive dressing gown waiting for a passionate evening.
At such a time, you cannot talk about work, household chores, etc. Talk about all sorts of trivialities, recall good moments from the past, turn on pleasant relaxing music. The purpose of this evening is to remind the man of his duties in bed, and also to remind you how much pleasure brings sex with his beloved woman.
• Make a favorite massage
Imagine a quiet evening, delicious smells of aroma oils spreading around the room, your hands gently massage the body of your beloved man. This process should bring pleasure to both of you. Such a session can not end in a way other than sex.
• changing
This is not about the fact that the husband stopped wanting you because of some flaws in the appearance or un-made-up face. But any man much more wants to go to bed with a woman in beautiful underwear, even if she suddenly leaves the body of his beloved, than when wearing her usual black pants and unremarkable bra. These are not such trifles, so in any of the cases listed above, this moment should not be missed.
• seduce at a distance
If it is not typical for your husband to return home at 9 pm and later, and he comes not very tired, you can start sending him SMS on his phone in the evening to describe his erotic fantasies. But this should be done only if you are sure that the husband’s phone will not be in the hands of some of his friends and you will not get into an awkward situation.
• Breaking own stereotypes
This method is suitable for pretty brave ladies. Perhaps your husband got used to the fact that you are rather shy, but it is time to change, because modesty in bed also invariably affects sex life. And now we turn everything 180 degrees. For example, going to an event, having already left the house “tragically”, declare that you forgot to wear panties. To the surprise of her husband and his words that we should return home, answer that no one will know about it anyway. Believe me, the night after this event you will remember for a long time, it will bring some kind of pepper in your sex life.
• Sex in unusual places
Yes, sex in the sea or in the mountains is not an invention of people who are obsessed with erotica. You need to do this, especially when your attempts to diversify sex life are increasingly failing. Be not what your husband knows you. Seduce, forget about the constraint, there is only you two.
• Flirt
In the first years of marriage, the presence of flirting in a relationship is not even discussed. Of course, spouses flirt with each other, seduce with looks and, as it were, random movements, but then it may disappear. Find out in this their relationship with her husband? Then this method is for you. Try to flirt with your beloved as much as possible, gently take him by the hand, kiss and hug at the meeting. All these trifles play an extremely important role, because intimate life needs to be renewed in stages, and starting with flirting is a great idea and the first step to violent sex.
Myths: why a man does not want sex
1. He has a mistress
Oddly enough, but it is this thought that comes to mind of the woman first, as soon as she realizes that sex in her life is becoming less and less. No, we are not trying to protect a man, among them there really are many who are capable of treason. But it is not necessary at the first suspicions to organize a grandiose scandal and to beat the dishes. If you really want so, you can quietly view her husband's phone, watch his behavior. The main thing is not to cross the line and not to demonstrate your suspicions, because if a man really is not guilty of anything and just gets tired at work, your thoughts about betrayal can seriously offend him.
2. I am not beautiful / seductive / attractive
This is another cockroach, which is one of the first to visit the head of a woman dissatisfied with sex life. Statistics says that about 70% of women are dissatisfied with their appearance. That is why the man’s reluctance to have sex only adds to his wife very serious complexes that are not so easy to get rid of. So women are arranged to be confident in themselves and their irresistible, they definitely need to hear pleasant words in their address and see that she is desired.
But remember, dear ladies, this reason is not always an obstacle to a rich sex life, although it may be one of the factors. In this case, beauty salons, fitness clubs and good clothing stores are waiting for you.
3. You are no longer at that age.
The age limits for sex are very vague, so don’t rush to write off everything on your husband’s recent anniversary, he may still be full of health and strength to meet your physiological needs.
It is very important to always remember that sex is not only an exercise in order to get pleasant sensations, but also a thing that is good for your health and well-being.
More than once it has been proven that sex relieves headaches, a depressive state, and also helps to keep the body in good shape.
